Jason and Sukh worked together six years ago. From Sukh’s end, there was no physical attraction but a solid friendship. After Sukh changed jobs she kept in touch with Jason through friends and after a trip to Romania Jason declared how he truly felt about her. Shocked by this revelation, it took Sukh two months to adjust from friends to partners as she felt it was a big risk. The risk paid off and on their second trip to Romania Jason proposed!
Most Asian weddings are very luxurious and everything Sukh’s family adore. Sukh really wanted it to be a fun event where people could relax and have a laugh, plus it was important to have a balance between the two cultures. Whilst her parents were over the moon to hear that they wanted a Sikh wedding they naturally assumed they would do all the Indian cultural things. They wanted a Sikh wedding because Sukh wants her children to be Sikh and Jason is happy to adopt that. It was important for Sukh to highlight the equality element and there were a lot of debates about how the wedding would be. They had to deal with family politics of a separated family and Indian cultural traditions. It was difficult for everyone to understand about Jason’s mum and sensitivity of anyone standing in on her behalf.
With a short engagement Sukh and Jason had everything in full speed with the support of family and friends. There were a lot of pictures being sent in family groups and things being purchased by everyone. It was important for the wedding to be about love and they wanted to do as much as possible without using professional assistance. There were times where Sukh felt like there were so many people involved and thought there was no end. That’s when they decided to spilt all the jobs and ideas and everyone took care of their task. She had to trust everyone knew what she wanted.
Sukh’s Mum did:
– table pieces
– chair covers
– pre night wedding
Sukh’s eldest sister Parm did:
– arranging DJ, photographer and videographer
– dancing shoes
– seating plan for the easel
– make up and hair for Sukh
– arranging a hair person for the girls and henna
– gurdwara contact and running
– helping with setups
– ornaments for those not with us
Sukh’s sister Dal did:
– music list for the two nights
– name tags
– pictures into frames
– helping with setups
Sukh’s brother Harm & sister in law Min did:
– managing bar tab
– checking timings and managing the DJ on the day
– helping with setups on all days
– managing the budget and costings
– buying kids board games
– milni list for the Gurdwara
– flowers for name tags
Jason and Sukh did:
– the hotel schedule
– main contact with the hotel
– table games
– seating plan and meal options
– guest book table
– henna for Tuesday
– magnets and baby bibs
– arranging accommodation for north family
There was so much to do and it was great to have everyone’s help. It wouldn’t have been the same without everyone’s input.
Format of the wedding:
Pre wedding party
The Tuesday before the wedding Sukh had a pre wedding party that was based on Sukh’s mum and older sister’s ideas and thoughts. They included the Chura ceremony and had a traditional Indian theme with lanterns and bright coloured umbrellas and cushions.
On Wednesday Sukh and Jason had their Sikh wedding at a Gurdwara in Hounslow.
For Jason’s family, Sukh organised a breakdown and attached websites and YouTube clips to give them an idea of what was going to happen. They organised the close family to come together and watch her brothers wedding film so everyone had a clear idea of how the day would go.
On Friday evening Sukh and Jason had their wedding reception at Old Thorns Golf and Country Club
in Liphook. The room they chose was 1930’s inspired and they had a Gatsby theme throughout. A lot of final touches came from Pinterest which was a fantastic source of information for Gatsby weddings. Sukh would send her mum pictures and she would make it happen.
Sukh & Jason did masquerade masks as favours which were purchased from a party shop in the Midlands. Sukh’s mum didn’t want the strings to tie the masks so there was a whole operation to attach sticks to them.
Little guests at the wedding had their own personalised bibs and a games table to keep them entertained.
Cake Topper: Jason made a joking comment to Sukh’s mum about how he wanted an elephant because he was marrying an Indian. Her mum was determined to somehow involve this elephant for him. It was difficult to find someone who would get it done within the time and use the design they wanted. “Sarah Cake Toppers was so helpful and would contact us regarding small detail. I was very impressed with her service and we received the topper within a matter of weeks.”
Thank you magnets: A modern take to a thank you card Jason & Sukh had a fridge magnet for each guest to take with them at the end of the night.
Wednesday Gurdwara outfits:
Sukh’s gurdwaras outfit for Wednesday was from Mongas
. Her sister had heard terrible things about their services so they were a little anxious at times however their experience was amazing! When Sukh first walked in and saw the chaos it was was the first time she was like I can’t do this! After five minutes they were approached by a sales person and he was brilliant. He understood what she wanted and they were out of the store within the hour. Sukh remembers how her sister Parm told her not to get overwhelmed before they walked in. Sukh was 100% overwhelmed and the sales assistant made the process so much easier.
Jason’s Gurdwara outfit was also from southall. It was the second outfit he tried on and Sukh had never seen him smile so much. Her mum paid more for his shoes to match but the store got it wrong. It was very difficult and they were chasing the week before the wedding. In fact they collected them on the week of the wedding!
Friday reception outfits:
Sukh wore a white dress from Diamond Nights and Days
in Bagshot, Surrey. The ladies were concerned whether they could get the outfit in three months but again, luck was on their side and it all worked out. Sukh tried on about five different outfits and her mum and the ladies only liked this dress. “It was even more meant to be because they had one pair of shoes in size 6, before I had even decided if I wanted them, mum had paid for them!”
Jason wore a Tux and he went shopping with his Dad, Step Mum & Sukh in Westfields and popped into M&S. Within two hours they picked up; day outfit for Jason for family BBQ, reception outfit and wedding bands. “It was too easy!”
Advice for other couples
” Getting married is so difficult and there are so many times where you think – is this worth it? Should we have a simple registry with ten people? There will be difficult times where people will say your ideas are not going to be good and live to their standard. It’s important that you know where you fight for something and when to allow others to get their way. I was blessed with Jason because he remained calm and we never allowed the wedding stress get between us. Don’t fight for every small detail with the family but don’t give up on the big ideas. On the day it is magical to see it all come together and see why everything happened.”